Table Talk

Room for dessert.

My dining room sits in silence like a museum display of a scene from the past. For a long time it’s been unused and gathering dust. As the holidays near, the room slowly begins to show signs of life. Today the room reflects the change of seasons. It’s filled with brown, gold and orange hues. The shining wooden table is decorated with a leaf-themed runner. Next to the fall flower centerpiece there are turkey candlesticks and pilgrim figurine salt and pepper shakers that pour spices out of the top of their heads. The dining room is ready for Thanksgiving even if I’m not.

“Why do you have such a big table in that room?” one of the children asked.

“To eat our meals on.”

“You eat at a table? Wow!”

Wow indeed. Meals have migrated from dining rooms, to kitchens, to living rooms and beyond. On a recent visit to my sister-in-law’s new home, she proudly gave me a tour. I was surprised when she said, “We don’t have a kitchen table. We wouldn’t really use one.” Unheard of, I thought. (I’m writing this column at my kitchen table right now.)

It may be a thing of the past, but dining rooms hold so many memories for so many families. My grandmother’s second floor apartment housed a huge wooden dining room set that would be right at home in a giant's castle (although I was a lot smaller back then). Every Sunday dinner felt like a holiday. Nana’s hot oven ran all day as she created magical treasures – roasted chicken, homemade bread, chocolate chip cookies and, of course, her famous lemon meringue pie (so good I used to eat it warm before it had a chance to cool).

Times have changed. Week night dinners are rarely served at the kitchen table. My wife and I eat dinner in the living room in front of the television while we watch Days of Our Lives on DVR. My dinner table is now a folding oak “TV table” (I’m not even sure that’s what they’re called these days). After all these years we are far removed from romantic candlelight dinners (we save those for power failures). We still have meal time chats, recapping the events of each other's day (just the highlights, no boring job details about things the other person has no interest in). We hit Pause on the DVR if we have important news to share.

In an effort to keep traditions alive, my wife recently resurrected Sunday family dinners. There’s another place to set at the table with the addition of our granddaughter's high-chair. We enjoy keeping in touch with our two sons on a weekly basis. It's nice to enjoy a leisurely meal while catching up on current events in their lives. We get to share thoughts on the future, as well as reinforce happy memories of the past.

Now that the dining room is coming out of hibernation, lots of memories are resurfacing just in time for the holidays. I remember my mother-in-law’s monumental Thanksgiving dinner in the 1980’s when I included a place-setting for my video-camera at the head of the table to record our epic meal – and that was before reality television really took off. One year the basket of rolls caught fire while being passed over lit candles on the table. On another holiday our dining room table was extended with a second table to accommodate the large number of guests. The two tables formed an “L” shape through the doorway and around the corner all the way from the dining room into the kitchen. Thanksgiving dinner in two rooms!

My dining room is so much more than a showpiece for flower vases, fancy curtains and unused furniture. Every meal celebrated there is a true dining experience. It’s important to preserve it even if we don’t use it to its full capacity anymore. It’s a room full of memories I’m not willing to give up yet. It’s a room without television, internet radio or cell phones. It’s a room full of peaceful silence and faint echoes of a past not yet forgotten.